“Leaving the Hills” Sonnet 35
“Leaving the Hills”
Sonnet 35
1/25/2000
Saddened faces carved in ice
That coats the window.
They’re leaving from the place
They’ve all known to grow.
Fun carved on from first time to last time
Till they heard the “time to go!”
College students too can whine
As they pile through the snow
Into buses- sardine cans.
Some slept, others wrote
About the smiles in their hands
And songs created in their throat.
Now all that’s left is sleep
To live again the scene.
jeques said,
November 14, 2007 at 12:18 am
Kevin,
We go through many passages in life, school for me is one of the most important and gave me my fondest memories in life. Afterall, it is the time when life is simplier, when we were still defining our dreams, the person that we would become. You wrote a strong piece of the hardest part of this passage, the leaving. I remember that transition, and I can still feel a lump in my throat everytime.
Some typographical error:
“Some [splept,] others wrote”
“About the smiles in [the] their hands”
I wish you well.
~ Jeques
Kevin Olsen said,
November 14, 2007 at 2:43 pm
Thank you for your constantly encouraging words, and thank you for pointing out the typographical errors . . . I have to admit I think that was the first poem I didn’t run spell-check on. Shame on you Kevin!
jeques said,
November 14, 2007 at 3:34 pm
Kevin,
Typo’s are but natural among writers. We, after all, are still human. Flaws could not be avoided sometimes, that’s where editors and friends come in.
I wish you well.
~ Jeques
Kevin Olsen said,
November 14, 2007 at 3:46 pm
Well then thank you, friend.
jeques said,
November 14, 2007 at 4:55 pm
You are welcome, Kevin, my new friend.
By the way, I reposted a blog entry about Haiku for you: “Discovering Haiku While I Am Waiting.” I hope it could help you in any way to explore the mystical Haiku form. Drop by my nook if you have time.
I wish you well.
~ Jeques